What goes around comes around is the most common phrase used when somebody feels hard done by.
This is a simple story that adheres to that phrase in a way that will have you rolling over laughing on the floor.
Revenge is a dish best served cold and this woman serves it ice cold
Make sure you read right until the end as that’s where the punch line is.
“So I had a feeling my husband was cheating as he set off a lot of red flags. Constantly laughing and smiling when texting, saying it was just his mother when I asked. Needing to stay late every night after work. When I’d call in his co-workers said he left hours ago. When I asked him what was going on he’d laugh it off and say it was just something they did to each other at the office all the time.
The last straw to where I knew something was definitely up was when he went out “to get milk” at 11:30 at night and didn’t come back until 2 in the morning. Now if there is any words of wisdom I can pass on to others in all my years of experience, it’s if you think your significant other is cheating, hire a private investigator. They’re good at what they do and they will get some evidence that really helps in the later divorce.
Fast track to his birthday, several months down the road. Now I know what you’re thinking, why the hell did I wait months before I confronted him and did it really need to be on his birthday? The answer to the first question is I wanted as much evidence as possible to hand off to my lawyer as well as make arrangements to find a new place to live, etc. Answer to your second question is of course it had to be on his birthday. You see after asking him what he wanted to do on his birthday this year he was rather insisted on me going out of town with my friends as he just had to work anyways and didn’t want to be reminded he was aging.
So I know something is up and after finding a bottle of champagne and two glasses hidden in my closet something in me snaps. So I do what any sensible woman would have done. I leave and go to my friends house pretending like I am going out of town. While there I call up his mother, father, sister and several of his friends. I tell them how I want to give him a big surprise by sneaking into his room with party streamers, kazoos and a big cake with candles. Sounds fun right?! Well, it sure was.
I had everyone meet me outside our apartment at 8:30 in the morning. We all pile in the elevator (about 8 of us in total); his mother is holding the cake and I’m reminding everyone to be as quiet as they can be. I put my key in and unlock the door; we all sneak in and make our way down the hall towards the bedroom. Each holding a kazoo and his mom holding the cake grinning from ear to ear.
Well as I throw open the door, we all yell surprise!
But the surprise was on us and there was my husband, butt-naked with his lover staring at us wide eyed. Mom drops the cake, sister screams, father begins to shout. I pretend like I’m horrified to which his friends try to push everyone out while yelling at him. My husband, excuse me, ex-husband is sobbing and screaming how could I while the lover is desperately trying to put her panties on while running out of the place.
Needless to say, it was one of the best birthday presents I have ever given.”
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